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brannigan (sarah's song)

from if it moves kiss it by young adult fiction

/

lyrics

i love you the way i loved the stranger on a bicycle i saw for six or seven seconds in the may of 2015, with bruce springsteen jeans and blonde hair and glasses like petri dishes. i love you like i love seeing your toothbrush by my bathroom sink, at 11:37 in the morning on a day you woke up before me to get to class, or work, or away. i love you like i loved the free beer at tom's birthday party that he didn't drink, but i did, for thirty or fourty minutes until i went and got sick out in the snow. (true story, made a fool of myself) i love you the way lemmings love lemmings, until there is too much love to bear and things begin to push... i love you like they love looking up as the world grows smaller and further away, and sea grows bigger and louder, to see his brothers and sisters begin to follow.
i love you more than i love words because i can only see and hear words but i can reach out and i can touch you. i love you the way my sister loved birds when she was sixteen, more and more and more and more and more until there were none that she hadn't already loved, and then there was nothing. i love you the way my mom loves trains that run on time. i love you the way my dad loves long words. and i love your love, and i am grateful. let's play pretend: i'm the dog, and you're the mailman. (thank you colin)

--

the man with the face of a baying cocker spaniel is at my door again
it's been some years but i still miss him now and then
i've still got his blood on my sheets and spit under my skin
he's pounding at the door and i can't help but let him in
he doesn't live here anymore so he rarely comes round
but if i ask nice he might let me hear his awful howls

the steam fills the house
the lights drift out
a voice takes my hand and presses me into the sound
and when i
open my eyes
i see:

swollen like a tick my ego sits
sings a lullaby from my best chair
it goes my love my love i went to hell
and saw you there

as he sings i hesitate, then start humming along
i build up a house of cards and he pulls out the tablecloth
then he kissed my cheek and anyway i can never hold a grudge
i wanna look like john wayne but i hate the taste of blood...

---

sugar soak my head
string wire across my bed
staring contest with the sun
when night falls you know you've won
drain ichor from my eyes
dali's needle cuts like a knife
slouching towards new bethlehem
i shot the rooster, fed the hen

credits

from if it moves kiss it, released April 29, 2022

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young adult fiction Ypsilanti, Michigan

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